I Promise
by bad-wolf-bay
Summary: the Doctor is missing Rose and can only watch her from afar. but who is that girl? also first in a series of songfics


He just sat there staring, constantly staring. Never moving.

Adventures were further apart, and then stopped altogether. She grew restless. This was not what she had bargained for when joining the Doctor. She had had enough of this mopy pathetic alien and she was going to do something about it!

"Doctor?" is all she said now. There was no point in talking to yourself. Sighing at the lack of a response, she decided to be annoying.

"Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doctor? Doc –"

"WHAT?!"

She froze. His bellow echoed through the depths of the TARDIS, the stoney face she had been accustomed to the last few months was suddenly alive, bright red, twisted in fury; the bleeps from the consol had stopped as if the TARDIS itself was terrified to make a noise so only his ragged breathing could be heard.

"What. Do. You. Want?"

Now he had asked her, now he had actually spoken the words, she didn't know what to say. Opening and closing her mouth a few times, with an added 'urm' and 'ah' thrown in was all she could manage.

"If that is all?"

Nodding, suddenly feeling ashamed, she left him alone back to staring at that damn screen as if nothing had ever interrupted him. The TARDIS now deemed it safe and was once again bleebing to no one. She wandered through the now familiar TARDIS going down stairs, along corridors, up mores stairs until she came to a particular corridor. This one was different, there was no metal like the rest of the corridors. No, this one was life, as if it was a corridor of the countryside inside the TARDIS. The door at the far end was made of what seemed to be Oak, but then it wasn't at the same time. Then the only other door, next to the larger one was completely different again. This one was made of just plain wood panelling coming straight from planet Earth. She could only get through that door, the Oak-ish one, not even the sonic screwdriver could get her through that. Looking back to the familiar door from home, she knew that one belonged to a 'friend', but she really knew it had belonged to the one before her. The one whose room was directly next to the Doctors, the one who still had a key to the TARDIS, the one who still held the Doctors heart, the one who was forever lost to him.

Opening the door she was assaulted by pink! Already knowing the room, her eyes became adjusted quickly to the pink walls, the pink bedspread, the pink curtains covering a fake window showing a council estate… walking through the clutter of cloths and make up and books she knew weren't from Earth, she finally picked out the bedside table, still with the noisy beep beep white alarm clock everyone hates, and this one still goes off every morning…well morning when it should be. Next to that were two photos. One was obviously the former occupant with what seemed to be her mother, and they seemed to be one the TARDIS. The other was of a countryside, almost like a dreamlike English countryside, or like New Zealand, depends if you liked The Lord of the Rings. But what was significant about it was what was on the back, _'From your Doctor, my home, my Rose.' _

A usual feeling rose up from her stomach, a feeling of such hate, almost making her retch. How was it that this _chav_ had taken the heart of such a gentleman. How did this troublesome _child_ made the Doctor like this? What was it about her? What had she done to him?

"She loved me. Get out."

Turning sharply, the Doctor stood in the doorway, his hands in his pockets, the pain so obvious on his face, she had to turn away. Throwing the picture back on the bed, she stormed past him in a fury.

"She's GONE! Get used to it."

The Doctor didn't watch her go, he didn't need to. Instead he picked up the photo and placed it delicately back in its original place.

"I promised you."

'_Now don't laugh.'_

'_Wow, you look beautiful!'_

'_I'd have to settle down, get a proper house or something, with doors and, and these carpets. Me! Living in a proper house. Now that's, that is terrifying.'_

'_You'd have to get a mortgage'_

'_No'_

'_Oh yes'_

'_I'm dying, that's it I'm dying, it's all over.'_

'_Hey, I'd have to get one to. And I dunno…could be the same one, I dunno…share…or not…whatever…'_

'_How long you gonna stay with me?'_

'_Forever.'_

He just sat there staring into nothing, lost in his own memories. All he could see was her. He watched as she cried. He'd been watching as she had searched for his call. He watched her fight and he was filled with such a old feeling, it filled his heart, made him smile. His hearts had not felt like this in such a long time, not since before the Time War. He had finally found someone to praise and be proud of. But she didn't know. She didn't know that as he watched her with those two babies (Jackie must have had twins – bloody hell)that he wished it was them in Jackie and Pete's place, that it was them together forever. He had lied a little bit at being the 'last Time Lord', for there was a way his Rose could have changed. It was quite simple … well for him anyway, though quite painful for her. But he had never told her. He hadn't wanted her to go through this curse. She didn't know any of it, not the jealousy and pain breaking his hearts. He watched her age gracefully, she always fought, the girl by her side. He watched as she gazes at the night sky every night with a 'Forever'.

She wouldn't know the pain that he felt as a single tear fell as the connection was lost. She would never be told just how much she meant: she had told him, but she could only guess at her importance. She would never know just how much it would hurt to see her wither and die, and that maybe Sarah Jane was right, maybe he was worth it.

**Did I disappoint you or let you down?  
**

**Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?  
**

**'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,  
**

**Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.  
**

**So I took what's mine by eternal right.  
**

**Took your soul out into the night.  
**

**It may be over but it won't stop there,  
**

**I am here for you if you'd only care.  
**

**You touched my heart you touched my soul.  
**

**You changed my life and all my goals.  
**

**And love is blind and that I knew when,  
**

**My heart was blinded by you.  
**

**I've kissed your lips and held your head.  
**

**Shared your dreams and shared your bed.  
**

**I know you well, I know your smell.  
**

**I've been addicted to you.**

He'd promised she wouldn't die like that. She would 'die' in battle. He had grabbed her hand in '69 and had promised her. He had kept that promise.

**Goodbye my lover.**

**Goodbye my friend.**

**You have been the one.**

**You have been the one for me.**

Even a 'regenerated' him and she was there scared and confused. But she was always there. Even if he wasn't. She knew how he worked. She could work on her own, the Olympics showed that. She had to put up with so much, the surprised: Sarah Jane, his off hand revelation 'I was a dad once'. But he could never live without her. The coronation showed that.

**I am a dreamer but when I wake,**

**You cant break me spirit – its my dreams you take.**

**And as you move on, remember me,**

**Remember us and all we used to be**

**I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.**

**I've watched you sleeping for a while.**

**I'd be the father of your child.**

**I'd spend a lifetime with you.**

**I know your fears and you know mine.**

**We've had our doubts but now we're fine,**

**And I love you, I swear that's true.**

**I cannot live without you.**

She lost one, but gained another, and didn't lose a thing. And she coped.

**Goodbye my lover.**

**Goodbye my friend.**

**You have been the one.**

**You have been the one for me.**

'Run' 'Rose Tyler' his first and last words. And she did just that. She ran and ran holding his hand all the way. She still stayed as he told her stories from the Time War, of his world, his people. He could talk to her about anything and nearing the end it would have been up to Ida to tell her…'If you see Rose …tell her …tell her …oh she knows.'

The hardest part was saying goodbye without words. A young human woman who's race had not yet reached the stars, who was so willing to loose her mother and daddy AGAIN just to stay with him. But he forced her to leave without her knowing. AGAIN.

**And I still hold your hand in mine.**

**In mine when I'm asleep.**

**And I will bear my soul in time, **

**When I'm kneeling at your feet.**

**Goodbye my lover.**

**Goodbye my friend.**

**You have been the one.**

**You have been the one for me.**

**I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.**

**I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.**

He watched her leave for the last time, it was only then that he knew it was pointless. He would never reach her in time. 'Forever' was gone. But as she was covered up it wasn't the woman he loved he was looking at. It was the younger woman. She still looked 18. she had done for the last 20 years.

ok this is just a songfic, but it is the start of a bigger story ive got in the pipeline so keep a lookout, lol. though it may be a while yet, it will be here asap.


End file.
